Why are there so many
songs about rainbows
when mine always fade into grey?
I keep looking for colours
in a life that keeps handing me
shadows,
hoping love will finally
turn its face toward me
and stay.

They say rainbows are visions
but maybe that is all my love has ever been
a flicker
an illusion
something bright enough to make me believe
and brief enough
to break me again.

I have been told to stop believing
to accept that some hearts
are not meant to be held.
But they are wrong
or at least
I need them to be.
Because somewhere inside me
is a stubborn spark
that whispers
wait and see.

Someday I will find it
the rainbow connection
not just the dream
but the one who reaches back
when I reach out.
The lover who does not vanish
the dreamer who does not tire
the one who sees the light in my eyes
and chooses to stay.

Until then
I wander this lonely and miserable path
with hope stitched into my pockets
believing that somewhere
beyond the next storm
is the colour I have been missing
the lovers
the dreamers
and maybe
finally
me.